A Confession

A Confession

I don’t want a life that requires much faith. 

I know that this is not the kind of thing a pastor should confess on the world wide web, especially when most people would prefer a super-pastor,  full of faith and God mo-jo.  Certainly not something you admit when starting a new church, hoping to attract new folks.  But, it’s true, and I suspect not just true about me.  I would rather have a life that is so secure, so safe and set that it requires  little faith to live it.  Sure, even the safest life requires some faith, but not much.

Becoming a church planter at this stage of my life has revealed this desire for a faith-less life.  A Jewish friend, who in the last few years has raised millions of dollars to build a new community center said to me last week, “This is the worst time to start something new.”  The subtext?  “You must not be very smart, or worse, you must be so full of hubris that you think that you can defy gravity.”  No doubt, I am more than capable of not being very smart, and of being full of hubris.  That’s not false humility, by the way, that’s the voice of experience, which is one thing that I do have at this stage of my life – experience.

I planted a church many years ago that grew to  have a great congregation, great staff, great facilities, great ministries, a great reputation in the community.  I’ve most recently served a great church with incredible resources, with an incredible history, an incredible platform of ministry. 

Starting over, so to speak, without many props, without certainty of success – well, frankly, it requies a little more faith than I would prefer.  Don’t get me wrong – it has great people involved, and it is a blast to see their faith expand and erupt into love for Jesus, for his purposes in this world, and for others.  But, it still requires a lot more faith than usual.  In this current economy with so many lay-offs and cutbacks, plenty of people are having to walk by more faith than usual.

Here’s the thing I’ve realized, though.  My natural inclination to have a secure life that needs little faith ends up being a life that needs very little God, either.  That’s the deadly part of security and safety, we get used to living without God.  There’s no need for God to show up.  “All set, Lord,” becomes our silent, unconscious prayer.

So, increasingly, I’m thankful for a faith-required life because it becomes a God-present life.  What about you?  Does your life require a little faith, or a lot of faith?  Not meant to be an insensitive question if your life has crashed.  Meant to be a challenging question if you are safer than you should be.